The Complications of Surprises and Vacations
by Hannah Lynn McDonald
Summary: Henry dies while Death is fetching Daniel Jackson. Minor crossover with Jurrassic World.


Henry opened the door, straightening the scarf around his neck as he shut it behind him and stepped into the office. Glancing up, he stopped midstep when he saw Adam sitting in Death's place, idly reading through the ledger.

"No - you've killed him."

Adam lifted his eyes from the page for a moment before returning to his reading. "And sentence myself to eternal purgatory with no reprieve? I think not... He is a nuisance, true; but the satisfaction killing him would bring would be unworthy of the consequences."

The Doctor looked around the room suspiciously, as if expecting to see the corpse of the Shade lying in a corner.

"You do realise that if I were to kill him, there would be no evidence whatsoever save my occupation of his job, correct?" There was no answer, and the elder sighed. "Stop painting me the villain in all situations. Whether for human emotions or for a dastardly plan, I swear that Death is as alive as he ever is and is merely gone away to fetch a soul back to Life." He turned the page over.

Henry hesitated; but finally sat down, tense.

Adam continued reading for several minutes before closing his eyes and breathing in deeply. "You make me uncomfortable - the air is heavy. For goodness sakes - relax! We are trapped with one another's company for an indeterminable amount of time until Death returns with his Blade to sign us perished." He dropped the ledger onto the desk with a faint grimace of distaste. Steepling his hands before him, he studied the Doctor until Henry straightened up impossibly further and snapped at him.

"What?"

"I merely wondered what had brought you to this office today, if 'twas Wyrd or of 'twas frustration."

"It was weird."

He blinked. "Oh?"

"...I abhor dinosaurs."

"...Dinosaurs?"

"Yes - lizards? Leviathan? Monsters? Dragons? Wyrms?"

He rolled his eyes. "I am not _actually_ 'Adam', Henry..."

He sighed. "Jo took me on a vacation - she wanted me to see something I hadn't before, and had heard of a new park opening with a...unique attraction."

Understanding began to dawn in the elder's eyes.

"yes, now you see..."

"And you _returned_ to that place?"

"It was a surprise - I wouldn't spoil it by meddling."

Adam's eyes lit up with faint amusement. "and Abraham's opinion of this escapade?"

"I've not returned again yet - nor was he there."

"Again?"

"There are quite a few creatures there that are sadistic or hungry - I'm not certain which."

"Mostly likely a combination of both - but I trust the Detective is safe?"

"Yes, having found a pistol somewhere."

"And then, of course, you left her?"

"What? No - of course not! We were separated, and I am little good-"

He sighed. "Henry, I know very well that you are an excellent marksman if you wish to be - brute animals would serve no great hardship. Especially with the size of some of those beings..."

Henry frowned, looking away.

"Please tell me that you are not actually arguing _for_ them!"

"It is not their fault, they are but animals-"

"They killed you."

"They were extinct."

"And while you and I are the only ones of our kind, it seems that a brute animal that is terrorising innocent children holds more consideration than I." He narrowed his eyes. "Or is this even about the animals?"

"It is about the animals."

"The curious quick defensiveness of the neglected spinster that cries out she has no use for a man..." He waited a moment and then sighed when no recognition sparked in Henry. "Why am I unsurprised that you do not recognise Wimsey..."

"You seem to think it necessary for this conversation."

He smiled slightly. "And how many saw you?"

"None - the children ran the other way when Jo and I distracted the creatures."

"Fortunate." For a moment, he thought to continue his thought; but then changed his mind and fell silent.

Henry watched him now, then looked around the room, waiting for Death to return. When the Shade was still absent after several minutes, he returned his wandering attention to Adam. "I trust there is not another case to investigate once we return to the precinct?"

"No, rest assured that all has been perfectly cleaned up." He leaned his head back against the chair. "Even if traces were left, it would fail to fall within your jurisdiction, for it was clearly a suicide. As well as not beneath your jurisprudence." He sighed when Henry refused to believe him.

"Then why are you here?"

"...I died?" He glanced at the other immortal. "I came to visit a friend."

Henry stiffened. "Adam-"

"You may remain secure in the knowledge that I have a vengeful plan to torture the innocents and terrorise the precinct - you, of course, will remain untouched."

The Doctor relaxed slightly. "You would not harm innocents."

"You sound so certain, Henry - you know nothing of me at all."

Henry opened his mouth to reply, but the door to the afterlife slammed open and the Grim Reaper shoved a man through it.

The young man stumbled; but quickly righted himself, speaking rapidly in Latin and older languages to Death, describing something. Or several things as he lapsed between languages, gesturing.

Adam almost smiled, picking up the thread of the conversation - a comparison of the different cultures and their afterlives, and comparing legend to the reality - and Death's bared teeth hidden behind his hood. The elder glanced toward Henry, but the joke was lost once the older languages were incorporated and the thread lost. He sighed, turning back just as Death knocked the man over the head with the Death Blade, dropping him to the ground sans consciousness and memories of the afterlife.

Death sighed, stepping toward his desk in a black mist and reappearing in his suit. Pulling his ledger towards him, he quickly entered Henry's death. "Do stay away from the mess hall in the future - not that she will..." He muttered, dropping into the seat Adam had quickly vacated. He waved in the unconscious man's direction. "Take him with you when you go."

Henry bent to lift the man, glancing at Adam.

"He's on suicide watch indefinitely - begone." He waved his hand, and a wind blew the other two out the door back into life.

Adam waited for a moment; and then slowly crossed to sit in the opposite chair, watching the tired Shade.

Finally, death reached into the drawer, pulling out a black box. "Chess?"

Adam nodded, taking the bone-white pieces. "...And it wasn't that hard after all, was it, Hel?"

"Ferendus tibi ..."

Adam laughed.

* * *

 _AN: the translation is 'you insufferable...'. Ever since I wrote the story about Daniel/cat, I rewrote the relationships in my head. Here, Henry would be more of an outsider because he's only two centuries instead of two millenia - and he also has friends and family around him. Adam lived through worse times, and really had to protect himself. As to the 'wyrd/weird' thing, 'wyrd' means 'fate' and is pronounced 'weird'. The immortal man is Daniel Jackson. Henry went to Jurrassic World, and I know nothing of that..._ _8-25-2015_ _Also, an amendment here now that I've finally seen the film. The dinosaurs I imagine here are the raptors – mostly because although they are my favourite and seemed to be good for once, I knew that the chances of them staying good were nil. So, in this story, the raptors are ALSO attacking the park. Because, what's one other new mistake we can throw in there..._


End file.
